i can taste the hope but i still feel the fear (♫)
[ It's a strange thing to be unmade. She'd never experienced anything quite like it before. Sure, Rogue had experienced a great many things, with the strange and unusual being the norm in her life since her mutation had presented itself, but this... This was something different. No longer was she coming undone simply in her own mind, the stress of dozens of psyches pulling at the strings of her own sanity. No, this was in body as well, the atoms of her very being splintering apart, vanishing and reappearing all in the same moment. She wanted to scream but she no longer had a voice, and there was no one to hear her regardless.
But then it stopped. Whether seconds had passed or hours, it didn't matter. She was whole, the ground solid beneath her feet, and she had lungs that could breathe again. A deep gulp of air brought with it the smells of a city, and in the next second she heard the sounds of that city as well. Even at night, it was alive with activity, cars rumbling and people talking and—
New York City. It was still here. Or, maybe, it was back, the way it was always supposed to be. With unsteady steps, Rogue moves to the entrance of the alley she'd appeared in, looking out at the neon lights in disbelief. It distracts her enough that someone nearly barrels into her as she just standing there staring, so she starts walking with the crowd, allowing the sea of bodies to help distract from her strange outfit. It's surprisingly easy to keep her hands tucked into the long sleeves so no one brushes against her bare skin.
She has no idea what's going on or how she'd gotten here. She was supposed to be... not here, not alone like this. But she also wasn't supposed to remember anything from before, let alone be in the same physical state. Something had gone wrong, but until she finds the others, there's nothing she can do about it. All she can do is survive. Which means getting her bearings and figuring out what to do next. ]
[ Peter might not be feeling so literally misplaced, but he certainly didn't know what he was doing with himself right now. After forgetting himself, being tricked, almost destroying humanity (for a second time), he wasn't sure what to trust. But he did know he needed to get away.
He had to see people living their lives and remember what it was like to not be in the middle of horrible virus plots or family conspiracies. And that wasn't even bringing up the whole special abilities thing.
He's trying desperately to keep his mind off of it, hands in his pockets, when he nearly runs into someone coming out of an alley. He steps aside to allow her space and they walk together, in that New Yorker 'we're going the same way' sort of way.
And he finds himself looking back to her once, then twice. The outfit's a little different, yeah. But what gets his attention is the look on her face. Stoic, but alone. Lost, maybe. ]
Hey, uh- sorry if I'm bothering you, but...do you need help with anything?
[ He gives her a small smile and tries to explain himself. ]
I've just had a really rough day, and it looks like you might've, too.
[ New Yorkers are a unique bunch. Eight million people living together, going about their own lives and trying to carve out their own tiny space, but at the same time forming connections and establishing communities everywhere you look. There's no place quite like this city, so she really shouldn't be surprised when someone addresses her.
She is, though, and it takes her a moment to process what he's said and that his smile is meant for her. When was the last time she'd had anyone smile at her like that? It feels like a lifetime. A dozen lifetimes. ]
Rough doesn't really begin to cover it.
[ Her southern drawl is smooth and slightly thicker than normal, her emotional state bringing it out in force. She might have long ago perfected the mask of being 'okay' but that doesn't mean she's not an emotional wreck on the inside. Forcing her own smile that most certainly doesn't reach her eyes, she shakes her head, striped hair sliding across her shoulders as she moves. ]
But I'm alright, sugar, thank you. I hope your day gets better.
[ Peter can tell she's not remotely all right. He's always been pretty good at noticing those things, even before he got a literal ability that seems to run on emotional connection. So he nods in response to her trying to hold herself together, but he can't quite leave it at that. ]
You sure? A coffee and a muffin might help a little. And you can use my phone if you need to.
[ He'll stop bothering her if she turns the offer down- he doesn't want to come off like he's trying to pick her up. But sometimes what people need is just one person to reach out a hand to help. And Peter could stand to focus on something that's not his own mess of a life, admittedly. ]
[ Rogue's first instinct is to turn him down again, because surely this nice man doesn't deserve to be burdened with her troubles. The offer of coffee pulls at her though, it's been so long since she enjoyed her favorite drink, and she could use the phone to call the school... If there even still is a school. Just because they stopped the world from going up in flames doesn't mean they made things any better for themselves. For all she knows, they might have made it worse. ]
Actually, that all sounds great. It's real nice of you to offer.
[ Her smile is genuine this time, even as she feels more than a little anxious about accepting the help of a stranger. It's kind of him and she truly does appreciate it, but there's been an awful lot of collateral damage in her life from letting people get too close. But this isn't the war, so... maybe things can be different now? ]
[ He smiles back, wider than before. He's clearly pleased that she's taking him up on this. ]
Sure. I think- [ He looks down the block. ] Yeah, Ground Central's right here. They've got great pastries.
[ He walks ahead towards the cafe, leading the way for this woman. Ground Central's a popular cafe, but there's not a large line right now. That's good, because it's a tight, hole-in-the-wall place, and has probably been a cafe since long before it had this cutesy name. A staircase gives away that there's a second floor, and the walls in the back are lined with filled bookshelves. It's definitely a place people go to relax.
Peter wasn't kidding about the pastries, either. There's some fancy tarts, muffins, even some egg bites, all looking very gourmet. The menu is written in chalk, giving the impression that they'd make whatever coffee-like drink you might desire. Once they're in line, Peter turns back to address his new acquaintance. ]
Pick whatever you'd most like.
[ He gets busy looking over the menu himself and gets a large macchiato and a blueberry scone. After Rogue gets a chance to order and he pays the barista, he'll hand her his smartphone. ]
You can look up whatever you need on there, too. It's got internet.
[ He gives her a little space then (or tries, anyway- this is a small cafe). He'll find a wall to lean up against and wait for their food. ]
[ As far as places to get her bearings go, he could have picked a lot worse. Granted, she'd much rather there be more space between her and every other person tucked inside the small cafe, but at least it's not a bar where everyone ignores personal space. Rogue follows the man to the end of the line, feeling like she's trapped in some dream or memory from another life as they wait to order. Things like coffee shops haven't been a part of her life for a long time, not since the earliest days of the war when every member of the X-Men had had their picture splashed across the news. Enemies of the State, hunted for being the poster children of the resistance against mutant persecution. They'd gone into hiding until the Sentinels—
Her thoughts are jarred away from those dark times as they reach the front of the line and she stumbles through her order: a cappuccino and a chocolate muffin. (Does she even remember what chocolate tastes like?)
With a lost expression, she accepts the phone he hands her, very carefully taking it to be sure not to touch his hand with her own. Even after so many years, it's still second nature to avoid skin-to-skin contact, a fact which she's grateful for. ]
Thanks.
[ Such a simple word; it feels small in the face of what he's giving her. She moves as far away as she can while not getting too close to anyone else, which only ends up being able ten feet, but it's enough.
The phone is older, the technology nowhere near as advanced as what they'd had in 2023, but it works just fine for her purposes. She opens the web browser, searches for the school... And there it is: Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. The photo on the home page looks exactly the same and she feels tears sting at her eyes. The faculty list is the same too, her old friends staring up at her from their posed photographs. And there she is, looking so much happier than she's felt in a long time.
After a quick glance over at her nameless new friend, she brings up the number for the school and presses the button to initiate the call. She's ready to jump out of her skin by the time it reaches the third ring, nervous energy threatening to overwhelm her, and then a voice comes over the line.
"Xavier's School, how can I help you?" In a rush of panic, she ends the call and stares at the phone in her hand. How is this possible? How can she be there and here? ]
[ Peter doesn't glance in her direction after she heads off. He'll let her get her bearings however she needs to. Instead, he keeps his eyes toward the counter, waiting on the order. However, this does have him thinking. Her behavior reminds him of something he's seen, something he's been through, but- nah, couldn't be. He'll just do what he can to get her situated and be on his way.
As he's pulling together his thoughts, their coffee arrives. He grabs the tray, which holds both coffee and plates, and turns toward her- to see her looking at least a little freaked out. It just pings him harder. He shakes off the feeling and nods with his head towards the back. ]
C'mon, let's sit and eat. Figure the rest out after. Oh- I'm Peter, by the way.
[ There's a couple of overstuffed lounge chairs in the back that are unoccupied, and Peter's making a beeline for them. He sets the tray on the table in between and gives her an encouraging smile. ]
[ Rogue takes a deep, steadying breath before following him, trying her best to pull herself together. Completely freaking out in public isn't going to help anyone and she needs to pay attention if she's going to figure this out. Besides, the world isn't ending anymore, not yet anyway, so what's the rush? Just take it one step at a time. ]
I'm R— Marie.
[ The name tastes like ash on her tongue, the girl who'd carried that name long gone now. Marie isn't who she is anymore but it's who she has to be, so she embraces her old self, wraps the mask around her and falls back into the southern belle she once was, all smiles and cordiality. ]
Thank you so much for all this, really. [ She sits and picks up her drink from the tray, leaving his phone in its place for one less chance of an accidental touch. ] It's hard to explain but I guess I really did need a bit of kindness in my day.
[ He nods, then lets them lapse into silence for a long moment. He takes the time to spread the cream on his scone and take a bite. They really are good here.
And then he does something that's probably really stupid, because he's Peter Petrelli and this feeling won't stop nagging at him. ]
So, this is probably a really crazy question, and feel free to ignore me, but- [ He looks her in the eyes and lowers his voice. ] Are you from the future?
[ That silence is welcome, the ambient noise of the cafe around them a soothing balm to her weary soul. Her mind might be a chaotic mess from the stress of the day but at least this new world is offering her a moment of peace to anchor herself in. It's more than she'd expected when she'd started wandering down that street toward nowhere in particular.
The first sip of her coffee feels like coming home. If she'd let herself, she could have dissolved into a crying mess right that second for the joy she felt at the taste she'd nearly forgotten. Coffee used to be one of her favorite things in life, and to go without it for so long...
Well, she's even more grateful to Peter now.
Rogue is just savoring her second sip when he asks his 'crazy' question, a delicious sip that procedes to go down the wrong pipe as she gapes at him in complete and utter shock. Coffee nearly gets everywhere as she returns her cup to the tray while coughing, covering her mouth with one dangerously bare hand. ]
How— [ She barely gets the word out before coughing again. ]
[ The expression Marie has even drinking coffee makes him more certain as he asks the question, but- maybe he should've waited a minute or two. He watches her with concern as she coughs, putting a hand lightly on her back near the shoulders. (he'll understand if she shakes him off, it's just second nature to him) He shakes his head a little as she tries to ask him how. ]
Take it easy. Just breathe. I'll explain in a minute.
[ One of the baristas actually brings over a glass of water for her- Peter thanks him and makes sure Marie's throat is clear (and no one's close by) before he continues. He speaks quietly. ]
It was a guess. But I asked because I've been before. I'm sure that future was different than whatever you- [ He shakes his head again. ] It always gets complicated. But I've got a friend who can time travel. He always kind of looks 'displaced,' too.
[ Peter also looked that way, when he saw himself in the mirror in that 'virus' future. Like there was no place for himself in that world, and he knew it. ]
[ It takes a lot for Rogue to not flinch at his touch, but she knows full well that there's no bare skin there for him to touch. The horrible grey uniform makes sure of that, at least, but she still wants to rip it off and set fire to it. Watching it burn would do more for her wellbeing than a dozen therapy sessions ever could.
Listening to Peter is... surreal, to put it mildly. How is it that the first person she'd met in this new time understands what she's just been through? Well, not all of it, but enough. It's a start, and far more than she could ever have hoped for.
She takes another few sips of water before even trying to respond to that, then holds the glass between her hands in her lap. ]
I wasn't supposed to remember. [ Her words are barely above a whisper but it still feels too loud. ] We sent someone back to change the past and it worked, so I don't know how I'm here.
[ The emotion in his voice is thick. He's remembering how he left someone behind in that future. Does Caitlyn even exist anymore? He has no way of knowing. ]
I wouldn't be surprised if it never goes the way we expect, because changing time is always such a mess. So it's- it's just you from that time, then.
[ That's about as lonely as it gets, huh? He speaks softly as he continues. He wants to give her options but not make her feel like she has to figure it out right away. ]
Well, stick with me for the time being, anyway. I at least kind of get it. Maybe we can keep an eye out for anyone that had been with you, see if maybe they got pulled through, too.
[ Rogue isn't so deep in her own emotions that she doesn't notice his. What he'd said before — he's been to the future? It doesn't like too far-fetched to guess that it hadn't been a good experience. But he'd only visited; she'd lived it. ]
It's more complicated than that. Take a look at your phone. [ She hadn't closed out of the school's website in the browser. ] I called there, I was going to talk to someone who might know what's going on, but—
[ She covers her mouth with one hand for a moment, then shakes her head. ] The person who answered was me. That's where I'm supposed to be, not here with these memories.
[ There's no hiding her distress, though she's still far from the stereotypical wilting flower in hysterics. She's just quietly losing her cool and trying not to draw any more attention to herself. ]
Whoa. [ Peter blows out a heavy breath. ] That's- yeah, that's weird. No wonder you looked so freaked out.
So it was supposed to be like a reset? Everything changes in the past and wipes out what you were going through... [ He shakes his head. ] I don't know why you'd come through here like this, either.
[ He puts a finger to his lips, tapping them in thought. ] We can ask my friend if he might know something. I think he's back in Japan, but I should be able to reach him. Or, uh- your school's for 'gifted' children? Is that like...?
[ He's unsure how to get this across, so he gestures in the air a bit. Unfortunately, since he's thinking about abilities, his telekinesis kicks in and a napkin on the tray floats up about a foot. When he realizes what he's done, he pulls his hand back. The 'oops' clear on his face. ]
[ Weird. Everything about her life is weird. She's had nearly two decades of constant weirdness and now this? Normalcy seems like a child's fantasy right about now.
She nods to confirm the plan had been to reset the timeline, erase all the horrible things and hopefully set the world on a different, better path. Of course, Peter doesn't have any answers, she wouldn't expect him to, but maybe his friend... Or maybe she can try again to reach the Professor. Changing her voice a little wouldn't be that hard, and of anyone, he might know what's going on.
Her hand reaches out automatically to catch the napkin before it can fall back to the tray, instinct taking over even after so many years. Displays of power in public are dangerous, they have to be concealed, brushed over in case there were any witnesses. So, she forces a shiver through her shoulders as she leans in to set the glass of water on the tray and pick up her muffin instead. ]
I think there's a draft. [ She speaks in a normal voice before quietly continuing. ] Gifted like that, yes. Is it— Is it safe for people like us now?
[ From the look on his face, she's fairly certain she can guess at the answer, but she still has to ask. She has to know if they'd made things better, at least, and if it had been worth all they'd lost to do it. After all, it's only been a few hours since she'd watched a good friend die, which is something she hasn't even begun to process yet. ]
[ Peter breathes out a small sigh of relief as she catches the napkin, and looks mildly embarrassed. Luckily, it seems like everyone's going about their own coffee business. One of his favorite parts about this cafe is how quiet it is- it seems like that's working to their advantage.
So after he gathers himself again, he considers Marie's question. He gives her a half-smile, a little apologetic. ]
People mostly don't know, honestly. I don't know what it'd be like if they did. I guess- it wasn't good, where you came from.
[ His hand curls up as he brings it to his mouth. It's making him think of everything his mother had been trying to plan last year- and what Adam had been planning just this week. Are these the only options? Kill or be killed?
He shakes his head, trying to clear it. ]
It's safer, at least. No one's watching for us. So, uh- if the school hears about you, they might understand.
[ Hiding. They're in hiding again. Maybe this... Maybe this new time will allow them to be safer? When her mutation was revealed, the world was already talking about mutants, already planning ways to discriminate against anyone with powers. Maybe things will be better this way. ]
I don't know what to...
[ Cupping her hands around the muffin, she murmurs the words while staring down at the shiny baked surface. Charles Xavier would understand. He would help her if she went to him, she doesn't doubt that for a second. But what could he honestly do? She can't teach at the mansion like before, a different her is already living that life. And she doesn't have family or any friends outside the school to who she could turn. After everything she's been through, she's just... alone. Again.
But then she shakes her head, forcing herself out of that thought spiral because this life couldn't possibly be worse than the one she'd left behind. The two don't even compare. ]
You're right, where I came from was bad. It was really— But we stopped it.
[ Rogue stares at his hand on her arm, the warmth from his touch seeping through the fabric of the horrible grey suit. If he'd reached for her hand... But he doesn't know. Would he be offering the same reassurances if he did?
She knows she deserves friendship. She knows she deserves to be treated decently, to be accepted for who she is instead of feared for what she can do. But knowing those things doesn't heal the wounds carved deeply into her heart. Try as she might, she can't just accept his words at face value. ]
Why? You don't know me, sugar. Why would you help someone when you don't know anything about their past or what they're capable of?
[ The questions aren't accusatory, nor are they merely performative. If he's truly one of those genuinely good people in the world, she doesn't want to abuse that kindness. ]
[ He takes a deep breath in, trying to figure out how to word this. Even for their limited group of powered people, what he's about to say is a little out there. ]
'cause I believe in destiny. At least a little bit. And I think us running into each other like that wasn't entirely coincidence.
Besides, I know what it's like to be a time refugee, and it sucks. So maybe we can help each other, with some of that. And hey- you did save the world, and I like living in the world, so--
[ He's getting increasingly more light-hearted, ending with a comfortable smile. Sure, he doesn't know much about her, but Marie's been handling this whole situation with grace and determination. He's realizing that he already likes her a great deal. ]
[ Destiny. It's strange to think about, and it's certainly not the first time the idea has crossed her mind. The strange happenstance of meeting Logan all those years ago in the middle of nowhere when he was the only one who could save her from Erik's plan... Yeah, she's considered the possibility once or twice. The war made it hard to stomach the thought, though. How could any of that been destined to happen?
But she isn't going to belittle his beliefs. She might not see the world the same way, but that doesn't mean she has to force that jaded view onto him. ]
I guess that's one way of looking at it.
[ There's something about Peter that buoys her spirit. Maybe it's his smile reminding her that people can smile — maybe it's that he's giving her a reason to. And she does smile, actually feeling it this time through the numb shock of the day. ]
I should probably tell you my real name. Well, it— It is Marie, but I go by Rogue.
[ His smile widens when she tells him her name- the one she's clearly more comfortable with. ]
Hi, Rogue. It's a real pleasure to meet you.
[ He's practically grinning by now, glad that she's not trying to brush him off further. He does think they can help each other, barring anything else. He nods down at her plate. ]
Okay, so enjoy your food, and we can get something more substantial after this. I don't know when you last ate a good meal, but it's probably been awhile. We can head back to my place after that, get settled? I'm not a doctor, but I am a nurse, and I think you probably need a little downtime after all that.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
restarting — for myowndestiny
no subject
He had to see people living their lives and remember what it was like to not be in the middle of horrible virus plots or family conspiracies. And that wasn't even bringing up the whole special abilities thing.
He's trying desperately to keep his mind off of it, hands in his pockets, when he nearly runs into someone coming out of an alley. He steps aside to allow her space and they walk together, in that New Yorker 'we're going the same way' sort of way.
And he finds himself looking back to her once, then twice. The outfit's a little different, yeah. But what gets his attention is the look on her face. Stoic, but alone. Lost, maybe. ]
Hey, uh- sorry if I'm bothering you, but...do you need help with anything?
[ He gives her a small smile and tries to explain himself. ]
I've just had a really rough day, and it looks like you might've, too.
no subject
She is, though, and it takes her a moment to process what he's said and that his smile is meant for her. When was the last time she'd had anyone smile at her like that? It feels like a lifetime. A dozen lifetimes. ]
Rough doesn't really begin to cover it.
[ Her southern drawl is smooth and slightly thicker than normal, her emotional state bringing it out in force. She might have long ago perfected the mask of being 'okay' but that doesn't mean she's not an emotional wreck on the inside. Forcing her own smile that most certainly doesn't reach her eyes, she shakes her head, striped hair sliding across her shoulders as she moves. ]
But I'm alright, sugar, thank you. I hope your day gets better.
no subject
You sure? A coffee and a muffin might help a little. And you can use my phone if you need to.
[ He'll stop bothering her if she turns the offer down- he doesn't want to come off like he's trying to pick her up. But sometimes what people need is just one person to reach out a hand to help. And Peter could stand to focus on something that's not his own mess of a life, admittedly. ]
no subject
Actually, that all sounds great. It's real nice of you to offer.
[ Her smile is genuine this time, even as she feels more than a little anxious about accepting the help of a stranger. It's kind of him and she truly does appreciate it, but there's been an awful lot of collateral damage in her life from letting people get too close. But this isn't the war, so... maybe things can be different now? ]
no subject
Sure. I think- [ He looks down the block. ] Yeah, Ground Central's right here. They've got great pastries.
[ He walks ahead towards the cafe, leading the way for this woman. Ground Central's a popular cafe, but there's not a large line right now. That's good, because it's a tight, hole-in-the-wall place, and has probably been a cafe since long before it had this cutesy name. A staircase gives away that there's a second floor, and the walls in the back are lined with filled bookshelves. It's definitely a place people go to relax.
Peter wasn't kidding about the pastries, either. There's some fancy tarts, muffins, even some egg bites, all looking very gourmet. The menu is written in chalk, giving the impression that they'd make whatever coffee-like drink you might desire. Once they're in line, Peter turns back to address his new acquaintance. ]
Pick whatever you'd most like.
[ He gets busy looking over the menu himself and gets a large macchiato and a blueberry scone. After Rogue gets a chance to order and he pays the barista, he'll hand her his smartphone. ]
You can look up whatever you need on there, too. It's got internet.
[ He gives her a little space then (or tries, anyway- this is a small cafe). He'll find a wall to lean up against and wait for their food. ]
no subject
Her thoughts are jarred away from those dark times as they reach the front of the line and she stumbles through her order: a cappuccino and a chocolate muffin. (Does she even remember what chocolate tastes like?)
With a lost expression, she accepts the phone he hands her, very carefully taking it to be sure not to touch his hand with her own. Even after so many years, it's still second nature to avoid skin-to-skin contact, a fact which she's grateful for. ]
Thanks.
[ Such a simple word; it feels small in the face of what he's giving her. She moves as far away as she can while not getting too close to anyone else, which only ends up being able ten feet, but it's enough.
The phone is older, the technology nowhere near as advanced as what they'd had in 2023, but it works just fine for her purposes. She opens the web browser, searches for the school... And there it is: Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters. The photo on the home page looks exactly the same and she feels tears sting at her eyes. The faculty list is the same too, her old friends staring up at her from their posed photographs. And there she is, looking so much happier than she's felt in a long time.
After a quick glance over at her nameless new friend, she brings up the number for the school and presses the button to initiate the call. She's ready to jump out of her skin by the time it reaches the third ring, nervous energy threatening to overwhelm her, and then a voice comes over the line.
"Xavier's School, how can I help you?" In a rush of panic, she ends the call and stares at the phone in her hand. How is this possible? How can she be there and here? ]
no subject
As he's pulling together his thoughts, their coffee arrives. He grabs the tray, which holds both coffee and plates, and turns toward her- to see her looking at least a little freaked out. It just pings him harder. He shakes off the feeling and nods with his head towards the back. ]
C'mon, let's sit and eat. Figure the rest out after. Oh- I'm Peter, by the way.
[ There's a couple of overstuffed lounge chairs in the back that are unoccupied, and Peter's making a beeline for them. He sets the tray on the table in between and gives her an encouraging smile. ]
no subject
I'm R— Marie.
[ The name tastes like ash on her tongue, the girl who'd carried that name long gone now. Marie isn't who she is anymore but it's who she has to be, so she embraces her old self, wraps the mask around her and falls back into the southern belle she once was, all smiles and cordiality. ]
Thank you so much for all this, really. [ She sits and picks up her drink from the tray, leaving his phone in its place for one less chance of an accidental touch. ] It's hard to explain but I guess I really did need a bit of kindness in my day.
no subject
[ He nods, then lets them lapse into silence for a long moment. He takes the time to spread the cream on his scone and take a bite. They really are good here.
And then he does something that's probably really stupid, because he's Peter Petrelli and this feeling won't stop nagging at him. ]
So, this is probably a really crazy question, and feel free to ignore me, but- [ He looks her in the eyes and lowers his voice. ] Are you from the future?
omg that is such a peter move
The first sip of her coffee feels like coming home. If she'd let herself, she could have dissolved into a crying mess right that second for the joy she felt at the taste she'd nearly forgotten. Coffee used to be one of her favorite things in life, and to go without it for so long...
Well, she's even more grateful to Peter now.
Rogue is just savoring her second sip when he asks his 'crazy' question, a delicious sip that procedes to go down the wrong pipe as she gapes at him in complete and utter shock. Coffee nearly gets everywhere as she returns her cup to the tray while coughing, covering her mouth with one dangerously bare hand. ]
How— [ She barely gets the word out before coughing again. ]
haha I was so pleased to write it!
Take it easy. Just breathe. I'll explain in a minute.
[ One of the baristas actually brings over a glass of water for her- Peter thanks him and makes sure Marie's throat is clear (and no one's close by) before he continues. He speaks quietly. ]
It was a guess. But I asked because I've been before. I'm sure that future was different than whatever you- [ He shakes his head again. ] It always gets complicated. But I've got a friend who can time travel. He always kind of looks 'displaced,' too.
[ Peter also looked that way, when he saw himself in the mirror in that 'virus' future. Like there was no place for himself in that world, and he knew it. ]
no subject
Listening to Peter is... surreal, to put it mildly. How is it that the first person she'd met in this new time understands what she's just been through? Well, not all of it, but enough. It's a start, and far more than she could ever have hoped for.
She takes another few sips of water before even trying to respond to that, then holds the glass between her hands in her lap. ]
I wasn't supposed to remember. [ Her words are barely above a whisper but it still feels too loud. ] We sent someone back to change the past and it worked, so I don't know how I'm here.
no subject
[ The emotion in his voice is thick. He's remembering how he left someone behind in that future. Does Caitlyn even exist anymore? He has no way of knowing. ]
I wouldn't be surprised if it never goes the way we expect, because changing time is always such a mess. So it's- it's just you from that time, then.
[ That's about as lonely as it gets, huh? He speaks softly as he continues. He wants to give her options but not make her feel like she has to figure it out right away. ]
Well, stick with me for the time being, anyway. I at least kind of get it. Maybe we can keep an eye out for anyone that had been with you, see if maybe they got pulled through, too.
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It's more complicated than that. Take a look at your phone. [ She hadn't closed out of the school's website in the browser. ] I called there, I was going to talk to someone who might know what's going on, but—
[ She covers her mouth with one hand for a moment, then shakes her head. ] The person who answered was me. That's where I'm supposed to be, not here with these memories.
[ There's no hiding her distress, though she's still far from the stereotypical wilting flower in hysterics. She's just quietly losing her cool and trying not to draw any more attention to herself. ]
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So it was supposed to be like a reset? Everything changes in the past and wipes out what you were going through... [ He shakes his head. ] I don't know why you'd come through here like this, either.
[ He puts a finger to his lips, tapping them in thought. ] We can ask my friend if he might know something. I think he's back in Japan, but I should be able to reach him. Or, uh- your school's for 'gifted' children? Is that like...?
[ He's unsure how to get this across, so he gestures in the air a bit. Unfortunately, since he's thinking about abilities, his telekinesis kicks in and a napkin on the tray floats up about a foot. When he realizes what he's done, he pulls his hand back. The 'oops' clear on his face. ]
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She nods to confirm the plan had been to reset the timeline, erase all the horrible things and hopefully set the world on a different, better path. Of course, Peter doesn't have any answers, she wouldn't expect him to, but maybe his friend... Or maybe she can try again to reach the Professor. Changing her voice a little wouldn't be that hard, and of anyone, he might know what's going on.
Her hand reaches out automatically to catch the napkin before it can fall back to the tray, instinct taking over even after so many years. Displays of power in public are dangerous, they have to be concealed, brushed over in case there were any witnesses. So, she forces a shiver through her shoulders as she leans in to set the glass of water on the tray and pick up her muffin instead. ]
I think there's a draft. [ She speaks in a normal voice before quietly continuing. ] Gifted like that, yes. Is it— Is it safe for people like us now?
[ From the look on his face, she's fairly certain she can guess at the answer, but she still has to ask. She has to know if they'd made things better, at least, and if it had been worth all they'd lost to do it. After all, it's only been a few hours since she'd watched a good friend die, which is something she hasn't even begun to process yet. ]
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So after he gathers himself again, he considers Marie's question. He gives her a half-smile, a little apologetic. ]
People mostly don't know, honestly. I don't know what it'd be like if they did. I guess- it wasn't good, where you came from.
[ His hand curls up as he brings it to his mouth. It's making him think of everything his mother had been trying to plan last year- and what Adam had been planning just this week. Are these the only options? Kill or be killed?
He shakes his head, trying to clear it. ]
It's safer, at least. No one's watching for us. So, uh- if the school hears about you, they might understand.
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I don't know what to...
[ Cupping her hands around the muffin, she murmurs the words while staring down at the shiny baked surface. Charles Xavier would understand. He would help her if she went to him, she doesn't doubt that for a second. But what could he honestly do? She can't teach at the mansion like before, a different her is already living that life. And she doesn't have family or any friends outside the school to who she could turn. After everything she's been through, she's just... alone. Again.
But then she shakes her head, forcing herself out of that thought spiral because this life couldn't possibly be worse than the one she'd left behind. The two don't even compare. ]
You're right, where I came from was bad. It was really— But we stopped it.
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[ He reaches forward to put a hand on her forearm. He doesn't want to disrupt her muffin-holding, but she needs to know he's here for her. ]
You stopped it, or it won't exist. Or whatever. It's better, and you have a place here.
[ Kind of an odd thing to say, but it just blurts out of his mouth. He knows he'd want to hear it. ]
...and I'm going to stick with you. Okay?
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She knows she deserves friendship. She knows she deserves to be treated decently, to be accepted for who she is instead of feared for what she can do. But knowing those things doesn't heal the wounds carved deeply into her heart. Try as she might, she can't just accept his words at face value. ]
Why? You don't know me, sugar. Why would you help someone when you don't know anything about their past or what they're capable of?
[ The questions aren't accusatory, nor are they merely performative. If he's truly one of those genuinely good people in the world, she doesn't want to abuse that kindness. ]
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[ He takes a deep breath in, trying to figure out how to word this. Even for their limited group of powered people, what he's about to say is a little out there. ]
'cause I believe in destiny. At least a little bit. And I think us running into each other like that wasn't entirely coincidence.
Besides, I know what it's like to be a time refugee, and it sucks. So maybe we can help each other, with some of that. And hey- you did save the world, and I like living in the world, so--
[ He's getting increasingly more light-hearted, ending with a comfortable smile. Sure, he doesn't know much about her, but Marie's been handling this whole situation with grace and determination. He's realizing that he already likes her a great deal. ]
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But she isn't going to belittle his beliefs. She might not see the world the same way, but that doesn't mean she has to force that jaded view onto him. ]
I guess that's one way of looking at it.
[ There's something about Peter that buoys her spirit. Maybe it's his smile reminding her that people can smile — maybe it's that he's giving her a reason to. And she does smile, actually feeling it this time through the numb shock of the day. ]
I should probably tell you my real name. Well, it— It is Marie, but I go by Rogue.
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Hi, Rogue. It's a real pleasure to meet you.
[ He's practically grinning by now, glad that she's not trying to brush him off further. He does think they can help each other, barring anything else. He nods down at her plate. ]
Okay, so enjoy your food, and we can get something more substantial after this. I don't know when you last ate a good meal, but it's probably been awhile. We can head back to my place after that, get settled? I'm not a doctor, but I am a nurse, and I think you probably need a little downtime after all that.